Well, tomorrow’s the big day… a new regiment of medicine.
I took some steroids today… suppose to give me more hair (‘cept the taxotere is suppose to help me loose more hair). Don’t ask me – I’m confused too. It’s suppose to keep me awake and agitated too, so all of you in different time zones may be getting a call from me! I might be ranting and raving about something.
My friend Norma called this morning. She’s a retired teacher who sings alto in my church choir with me. She is always bringing Hope books and stickers and stuff to do while we practice singing. I don’t know what I’d do without her, she’s a great friend.
So she said she had to tell me a story about my precious daughter (“Oh oh”, I thought, “What did she do now?”). Norma said she phoned her son and told her this story and both of them were bawling, so beware.
Last night we were singing for the Reconciliation mass. That’s when you have about 16 Catholic priests listening to confessions all night. I was debating whether I should go to confession, as I haven’t gone since I was little. Norma said, “Go to the guy at the back of the church, he is really cute”. “That’s what I was thinking…”, I told her, so off I went. I asked my daughter to stay with Norma, but she kept telling her, “I want to go, I want to go to confession”. Norma told her she would take her next year after she had her communion. Then she asked Hope if she would like to light a candle. “Yes, yes, of course”. So the two of them went to light two candles. Hope lit the first one and prayed to Mary, Joseph, and Jesus, and that her mother would get better. Then she asked Norma what she would like for Christmas. Norma told her she wanted to be the best tennis player in the whole wide world. Hope told Norma that she asked Santa to tell Jesus that she wanted him to get rid of cancer in the whole wide world.
And this is why Norma thinks Hope is a precious child.
Bless me father for I have sinned, I haven’t been to confession in ohhh…. about 35 years. But I thought I’d come today to set a good example for my daughter, who is suppose to have her First Holy Communion this year. He laughed. I told him that I thought that in the last 35 years, I am sure I probably broke every commandment there is, except I didn’t kill anyone. “That’s good,” he answered. I told him some other stuff, but I’m unwilling to share it with you… go do your own confessions if you want dirt.
Later, the priest asked me to say the Act of Contrition. I must have looked a bit skeptical at that one (I know the Hail Mary, Our Father etc., but I don’t remember that one from catechism classes from oh so long ago). So he said the prayer for me in French. He apologized for saying it in French. I told him, “Don’t be silly, that was beautiful… I caught some of the words because they are like italian”. “Boy, he would be a good catch for someone I know,” I thought. Tall, kind, very good looking man, French…’cept he is a priest!
Okay, so you want to know my pet peeve this Christmas Season. I hate that stupid song “Christmas Slippers.” You know, the one with some kid standing in some shopping store buying slippers for his mother who is dying of cancer or something like that on Christmas. For heavens sake, could you hear a more depressing song? Get back to your mother, she really doesn’t need any slippers.
That reminds me. I went to my cousins house last week, and she gave me a present (she told me what was in there). My husband and children were analyzing what was beneath the Christmas tree the other night. “What’s that?”, asked Bobo, pointing to a present. “Slippers”, I answered. “You are going to die Christmas Night”, he answered. “Thanks a lot,” I told him, “I was thinking the same thing”.
So if that does happen, here is the plan.
Tell Norma to get the really cute priest to do my funeral so my French friend can meet him. I’ll be rooting for the two of you from the heavens. Norma can decide what music to sing with the choir, she knows my favourite ones (ie: Like a Shepherd, Be Not Afraid, Jesus, The Lord (M. has to do the descant). Tell Norma not to sing “Amazing Grace”, because that was the song we lost to in a choir competition I put my class in one year. I’m still upset about that one because since when is Amazing Grace a Christmas Song? They should have been disqualified. Fire the judges, I say. Norma hates that song anyway so I’m not too worried she’d pick that one. And I want Julia to sing Pie Jesu and Ave Maria because she is the best singer I know.
Donations can go to an educational fund for my kids!
Damn that Christmas Slippers song.
It’s right there with that disturbing song, “Feed the Squirrels”… let them know it’s Christmas Time. You know the one.