Day 2 Germany- Starting Treatment

Germany, Day 2 Starting  treatment

It’s Tuesday. Visit with Dr Sommer and Mariann to find out what’s wrong with me. Liver and kidney, (probably from all the stuff I was eating in Italy) , nervous system, heart, lymphatic system, colon/intestines and there is some kind of screw up with my brain sending messages to the rest of my body.  The only good thing he said is that my resistance is good.  I’m thinking that means my immune system has gotten better.  He asked me what meds I’m taking from Canada and I told him nothing but Xgeva (to fortify my bones) and Zoladex (to stop my periods).  He seemed happy with that.  I asked him if I should keep taking Xgeva because of all the jaw bone necrosis and broken femurs that I’ve been hearing about on mets cancer sites.  He then told me I can stay off Xgeva since I’ve been on it for 4 years.  Not necessary!  No point… I read that shit can stay in your system for 10 years after you’ve taken it.

Hurray! One less shot in the stomach every month!  (4 years = 48 Xgeva shots so far).  Bloody hell!  Glad to do away with it.

image So part of my daily regiment for the next 2 weeks includes being put under a lamp (called the eichotherme) to detox, and to improve my cells and blood circulation. It also gives me Vitamin D with the good ultraviolet light. The instructions are only in German or Italian and the guy talks too fast. I keep having to flip from one side to my stomach then the other side, then 1/2 way to my back and side to side. Good thing we went to the spa yesterday cause I think the guy said don’t have a bath, smoke or drink coffee. No more caffe lattes. Sigh. More ozone treatments, B17 (amygdalin) and other b vitamins eichotherme lamp and colon hydrotherapy to get rid of toxins while I’m here.

Today I had 4 injections, ozone treatment (my own blood + ozone), amygdalin IV (took 5 times to get my IV going because my veins kept collapsing).  Ouuuuuuch!

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Last night Mary and I went to the Caracalla spa.  It was wonderful!  I love that place.  So relaxing… Thermal hot springs.  I slept well when we got home.

Had to take some fizzy alka seltzer stuff before I went to bed in preparation for tomorrow’s colon hydrotherapy.  Apparently I’m full of shit 💩and it needs to come out😚.

Just thought you’d like to know….ha ha ha.

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I’m Good (for now!)

Thought I’d better blog again because people are starting to phone and ask me if I’m alright.  I’ve also been told to keep it short!  So here it goes!

My Carepath nurse collected my CT Scan results and told me I was stable!   Hurray!  Life is good.  

 I think my hemoglobin is better now because I can walk up the stairs better without huffing and puffing and feeling like my legs are full of jelly.

I’m glad she let me know since I still haven’t seen my oncologist since November.  My January appointment consisted of sitting in the waiting room with my husband for 1 1/2 hours.  We had to leave again because my husband has 1 hour for lunch and he was gone for 2.  Funny how my clinic note (which I now have Internet access to) stated I telephoned and told them I couldn’t make it in for my appointment.  Hmmm……  not sure how I’m going to handle that.

Top-40-Funny-Minion-Quotes-and-Pics-Best-minionsI requested to see my oncologist in February when I was suppose to get my shots in the stomach. However, he is on vacation; so now I don’t see him until March.  Oh well, if I’m stable now, I’m good.  My hemoglobin, red and white blood cells were really low in December (worthy of a blood transfusion), but now I got some new medicine from Germany and am feeling much better.  Guess it was worth turning yellow for a while.

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And now for some humour….

This is a conversation about reading which I overheard from the back seat of the car….

Frack:    There are no good books in my classroom.  They are all so old.

Frick:     Really, in my classroom, the books are from the 1900’s.

Frack:    Oh yeah, well the books in my classroom are from Jesus’s time.

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life is shortPoor Bobo. He comes home one night with chunks of meat in his coat pockets.  “Darn,” he said, “Now I’m going to have to get my coat cleaned.”   He forgot to take his ziplock bags when I sent him over to my parents to fix their TV (they keep pushing the wrong buttons and then get no picture/TV).  Well, you know you can’t go into an Italian house without being fed something. Needless to say, he wasn’t prepared to hide whatever he didn’t want to eat so he stuffed the food in his coat pockets when they weren’t looking.  I laughed and laughed and laughed at him. 

I wish I was smart enough to think of concealing ziplock bags for food when I was a kid. 

Would have saved my butt from getting whacked more than once!

wooden spoon

Oh Crap, Now What?

Dear Life what the hell ru trying to do to me

Well, the results are in and now I really don’t know what to do.

Apparently the tumour in my right lung is 2mm bigger than it was in August.  In 2013, they saw something there.  On Jan. 2015 it was .9 mm.  In August it was 1.9 cm.  Now it’s 2.1 cm.

I don’t see my oncologist until the end of January.  I could always go back on that horrible drug capecitabine that burned my feet so bad I couldn’t walk.  Or I could ask to get hooked up to a picc line for a couple of hours on Taxol (chemo IV) which will make all my hair fall out, including my:

1.  eyelashes (so I will cry if it’s windy)

2.  my eyebrows (I never was that great at drawing them back in)

3.  my nostril hairs (nothing to catch the snot) and

4.  let’s not forget all my pubic hair (free Brazilian wax).

And let me remind you that Taxol was the drug that stopped my heart on my 2nd treatment.   Fancy going to my grave prematurely because of it rather than cancer.

Hmmmm.  Choices, choices.  Risks Vs Benefits.  Wait.  Wait.  I think I’ve made up my mind.

I think I’ll stick with Germany.  I could always go back in the summer and try some curcumin IV if things start to progress again, but frankly, I think I’m pretty stable now.

I just spoke on the phone with my friend who is a nurse.  She said that sometimes when technicians are reading a CT, there may be a shadow making a spot look bigger than it is. That makes me hopeful that my results aren’t that bad.  My CT Scan also mentioned a spot or two on my left lung that was unchanged in this interval.  Sigh.

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I had my junior girls volleyball try outs today and I must say, they are looking good.  Had a big fat juicy gluten free burger for dinner to get my hemoglobin levels up.  Tomorrow I’m going to go for my vitamin C IV in the morning (more oxygen) and then I’m going to revisit my salt cave in the afternoon.  Maybe all that salt in my lung will shrink and kill the damn tumour.  I wonder if anyone has studied that?  News Bulletin….Salt Kills Cancer.

I found a giant natural salt cave in, where else?  Germany.  Gotta add this to my bucket list.  You can sleep there overnight!  Check this out.  You even take a little kiddie train through the mountain to get to the salt cave. Who wants to come?

 

And now some special messages…..

Rumours have it that a Great Big Baby Shower was in the works for me at work.  Thanks guys, you truly are the best, really… (smirk!)

McLandress….loving those pictures of you lapping up the life of luxury in South Africa.  I have a job for you.  Can you get in a jeep and make your way up and down the east/west coast of Africa and every time you make it to another country, log into my blog so I can see it light up?  I’m not asking for much.  You are already over there.  Just don’t drive in the ebola territories.  I don’t want you getting hurt.  And watch out for the animals. (P.S.  I got Kenya, Uganda, and South Africa covered…you’re in charge of getting the rest).

Bobo….if you are reading this post.  I know you don’t like washing dishes until the next morning but really, if you are eating fish for dinner, the stuff REALLY needs to be washed right way or it gets quite SMELLY in the house.  So unless you want me to puke tomorrow morning, please, please, please, wash anything touched by a fish immediately upon consumption.

Sandy….good luck on your operation tomorrow.  Let me know if you want anything…a visit, some grub.  I promise it won’t be gluten free unless you really want it.  My kids won’t eat it, so I don’t expect you too either.  I can do take out too, if you’d rather.  But I don’t know where you live (you may not want me to know where you live).  If you do, just call (but not on my cell phone, it’s dead and still lost in this house somewhere) or email me. Luv you.  Hope you aren’t in the hospital long.  Same day service works best.  I’d get out of there quickly if I were you.

Doug….I’m bringing that cup I won with the bell on it next Thursday….. expecting good service!  My birthday is coming up.  Don’t forget my cupcake!  Ha Ha Ha!

Frick and Frack…no I am not having a baby even if you do want one.  Stop encouraging me.  It ain’t happening despite what the blood test results say.

Life boring without me

 

 

Miracles Happen, Right?

IMG_2225Tuesday, January 5

Would you believe that I still have no results pertaining to my lung yet?  I was checking all day, scared of what I might find.

Saw my surgeon.  He is a good guy. Asked me how I was doing.  I’m okay, I told him, but it looks like I have mets in my bone marrow again… although I don’t really believe it because this happened to me before when I came back from my cancer treatment in Germany.

Oh?  Why did you go to Germany?

Now there’s a loaded question.  This is what I told him.  Hmmm…it might be because they almost killed me three times here.  Or maybe it was because the hormone treatments stopped working and they told me they couldn’t do anything for me anymore except manage the pain.  That’s when I decided to high tail it outta here because at least over there they thought they could keep me alive for many years to come.

“Well it looks like Dr Sahgal is happy with your progress,” he said.  “Nothing going on in your spine.  Your bones are growing back and your hardware is good.”

nutella

“Yes but my oncologist is not happy with me right now because I’m not doing what he is telling me to”, I replied.

“How did you find out about this place?”, he asked.

“My friend knew someone who went there”, I told him.

Short and sweet and I was out of there with an appointment scheduled for next year.

Before I saw him,  I was talking to the nurse in the room by myself (she was the one that nicknamed me “The Screamer” after my surgery).   I asked her if she would mind looking for my chest CT scan on her computer because it wasn’t appearing on myUHN.  I had results for my pelvis and abdominal scans, but nothing has been reported about my lungs.  I was worried because I have been coughing lately and I was told in August that I had a tumour at the bottom of my right lung.  She checked.

Thank heavens PMH actually did the scan which included the lungs.  That was a relief because I would have gone on some kind of Italian rampage if someone messed that up and I had to go do this again. I really don’t need more radiation considering I’m maxed out.  The nurse went through the slides and said, “I’m no technician or anything but I don’t see anything”. Meanwhile, I was peering over looking for white spots on my lung scans too and didn’t see anything either.

Now wouldn’t that be something if the 1.9mm intelligent doubts, stupid confidencetumour they found in August and spots on the fissure line disappeared just like the thing on my pancreas?

Miracles do happen, right?

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That afternoon….I decided to try something new today to alleviate my bronchial asthma problem.  I visited a salt cave.

Several years ago when I experienced this same yearly nagging cough in the fall (rain + leaves = mould), my allergist told me the only way to get rid of it is to go to somewhere hot with a beach and breathe in the salt water air.  Sounds enticing.

Well although I would love to escape right now, it ain’t happening due to the fact that my family dr seems to think I need a blood transfusion and I’m not exactly rich.  Btw, I phoned Germany for some hemoglobin help and it should be on its way.  Plus I stopped taking my German drugs temporarily until my white/red blood counts improve.  There was also some mention about giving me a neupragena (sp?) shot ($3,000-4,000 a pop) on my Sunnybrook blood test results but no one has phoned me about that one yet.  That prescription certainly will give me lots of air mile points for my next trip, as a patient usually needs 3-4 shots to get their counts up. Although I think I would decline that proposed strategy because I’m sure it comes with some interesting side effects which I could do without.  I get to visit my family dr next week.  Can’t wait to discuss the sudden disappearance of “my baby.”

IMG_2211The salt cave was wonderful on my lungs.  I spent the first 1/2 hour coughing up a storm.  I felt rather bad for the gentleman in the cave with me and my older sister.  He certain didn’t get a quiet session because I was coughing up a lung.  Felt really good.  Salt is so healing.  Wish I had know about this before when I suffered with bronchial asthma.  I can’t use a puffer because I’m allergic to ventolin, alupent and its whole medicinal family including it’s cousins.  The cave was a little bit cool so I wore my white alpaca babushka hat which I bought from Germany.  My friend Doug calls me the Snow Queen whenever I where it.  The cold weather lately sure warranted it.

IMG_2208

Wednesday, January 6

Still no lung news.  I phoned the CT Scan place….got a recording, what else.  Maybe if I’m in a bad mood, I’ll nag them and call them every 5 minutes tomorrow.  Fill up their answering machine with 20+ calls.

Today I went to The Art For Cancer Foundation and made the  winter scene above.  It was challenging.  I enjoyed painting it, but my back sure could use a rest.  Time for bed.

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Below are the benefits of going into a salt cave, should you ever decide to go.  The one I went to was in Mississauga.  There is one near York University, in Niagara Falls, and The Windsor Arms Hotel.  I didn’t realize it increases your hemoglobin level too!  Next time you’re sick or have a respiratory ailment you may want to check it out.  Prices range from $17 (Groupon) to $50 for an hour session depending where you go.

IMG_2229

One Minute You’re Pregnant, The Next Minute You’re Not

normal

So last night I decided to delve back into the results of my blood work from Sunnybrook because some of the tests were time sensitive and needed longer to get the results.  Probably not a good idea.

Really?

Apparently one the tests indicated that I was pregnant.  I thought that was hilarious and decided to go downstairs (with my Ipad/video) to lay the big news to Bobo.  “What are you doing?,”  he asked me covering up my Ipad with his hand.  “Oh, I have some great news!  Are ya ready?  Tell me you are ready.  Remember the blood work I had from Sunnybrook?  Well apparently, I’m pregnant.” 

couples

Stunned belief is the best I can describe the look he gave me.  “Oh come on,” I told him.  “There is no way.  They messed up again.  What else is new?”  “Do you want me to go to Shoppers and get one of those pregnancy pee tests?” he asked.  “Are you kidding me!  Save yourself the money”, I told him.  “It’s another fuck up.  You should know by now not to trust anything they tell you.”

Me Bad, Never

Oh this is going to be good tomorrow when I go to PMH to get my CT scan and they ask me if there is any chance I could be pregnant.  Yup, here it is on this sheet!

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Did NOT have a good day at PMH.  Went in at 8:00 with Bobo.  The secretary looked at my blood work, took the sheets to the technician, and then told me they would not do the test unless I got clearance from my doctor.

rope:neckWell my doctor wasn’t coming in until Wednesday.  My nurse told me that it must be wrong because I’ve been on ovarian suppression shots all these years.  But the CT Scan secretary wouldn’t hear of it.  Said I had to have PROOF that I wasn’t pregnant.  Was thinking that Bobo’s idea about peeing on a stick was a quick and efficient way of testing it out until she said it had to be Blood Work Proof!  I think I’ve masterminded the art of rolling my eyes by this point. 

Had to go to the Dr On Call to put in a requisition for more blood work.  This is what 1/2 the line looked like while I was there. It was all the way out into the hallway.

image

And this is the sign which says how they are improving their services so you don’t have to wait so long in line.  Beautiful.

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When I finally got in, the guy at the lab told me they had to send it across the street to Toronto General because they didn’t do that kind of testing here….2-4 hour wait.  Grrrrr.  And I wasn’t allowed to eat anything either. 

Just after 11:00 my ipad dinged and I had a message from UHN telling me, guess what?  I’m NOT pregnant.  Ohhhh….Big surprise there!  

Took my ipad to the CT secretary who, as soon as she saw me said, “The results aren’t in yet”.   “You wanna make a bet,” I told her, throwing my ipad in her face.  She ran to get my contrast dye drink. 

Train u 2b CrazyNow here’s a helpful hint if you are ever in a situation where you have to have that CT Scan drink that tastes like orange toothpaste.  Tell them you are allergic to it and then they will give you another more expensive one that tastes like weird water.  They both give you diarrhea, but drinking orange chalky toothpaste is not my idea of a good time.  My scan wasn’t until 1:00.  Waiting again. 

They told me to get into a gown.  I told them not on your life, it was freezing in there.  I would take off all the metals on me, including my bra and go in with my track pants/top, but that was the best I could do.  I was not going to get into one of those flimsy gowns today.  Thankfully, he didn’t object.

advice

When the technician felt my hands to put in the needle he said, “Boy you really are cold”.  Yup.  It was really chilly outside (-16) and inside the hospital too.  The only good thing about this freezing weather is that my cough has improved now that it’s not so damp outside.

Anyhow, got the Ct Scan done.  I got back 3 out of the 4 tests.  The one I really wanted (lung) has not arrived in my inbox.  Sigh.

Here’s what I did learn….

  1. I am not pregnant.
  2. There is nothing new in my abdomen.
  3. There is nothing in my pelvis….maybe an spot on bone L5 but that wasn’t mentioned in my Sunnybrook MRI.

Now I just have to wait for the lung one.  I’m expecting it to say I have pleural effusion because I am still coughing up mucus.  The last time they saw that my oncologist said I would be returning in 3 weeks to get the cancerous fluid drained from my lung.  I told him it was allergies.  I was right…the pleural effusion disappeared.  However, I want to know about the spot(s) they they found on my right lung and fissure line the last time I had a scan.  Hoping they disappeared like the IMPN on my pancreas.  Oh, that would the a miracle I am searching for.  

My family drs office phoned re:  blood transfusion.  Told them I’d phone back later if I was interested and did they know I was pregnant?  And tomorrow I get to get up bright and early to visit my surgeon who put in my metal rods in my back in 2012.  I’m going to bring him a bottle of wine and thank him that I’m not a paraplegic.

Still Alive

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Sometimes I just wished all this would JUST GO AWAY.  

Sigh…..

travelling

U know Ur in Trouble When the Dr Calls!

So early this morning before I even got out of bed, I got a phone call from my family doctor. Oh.., that can’t be good I thought when I heard her voice. It’s not the secretary.

“Ahhh, I got your blood work back and it looks like you need a blood transfusion,” she said. “However, the problem is that every place where you can get this done is closed today and I don’t even think they can do it for you if you went to emergency.”

“It’s my lucky day,” I thought. I’m not going to emerg today. Happy New Years!

“So how low does your hemoglobin have to be when you need a transfusion?”, I asked.

“The low 80’s,” she answered.

“What am I at?, I questioned her.

“78…. I’m surprised you are still walking.” she responded.

“Well I wasn’t walking last week and I turned yellow, but I’m better now.”

“What do you want to do?”, she asked me.

What can I do? I’m going to party? Everything is closed until Monday and that’s when I’m suppose to have a CT Scan. So I’m going to do nothing right now. I don’t really care anyway. I’ll send Germany an email and tell the dr to send me something. This happened to me before.
“Just don’t get cut until then,” she said, “And get into hospital if you start bleeding for any reason”.

“Even a hemorrhoid?”, I asked.

“Even a hemorrhoid”, she answered.
WTF? Now I’m going to be shitting blood too? I don’t think so!  Holy crap!

By the way, did you happen to get the results of my latest MRI?, I asked her.

“No,” she said.

Well, apparently I have extensive metastatic disease throughout my bone marrow again.

She didn’t say much after that. I think my doctors are more worried than I am.

I had a nice burger yesterday hoping to get my hemoglobin up. I’m eating more now, but I now weigh the same amount I did when I was in university. Bobo says I’m getting pretty skinny. My scale says so too.

The conversation in the car went really well on our way to the market.
Who wants to give me some blood?, I asked.

Aughhhhh! No way, cried my brood in the back.
“I will”, said Bobo, my universal O type donor husband.
“Good”, I said. We just need two needles and a tube and we can attach ourselves to one another! True love!

Happy New Year Folks. I need to drink some blood tonight. I’m turning into Dracula’s wife tonight!
Cheers to 2016!

Things Are Looking Up

Yesterday I was a wreak because I had to go get an abdominal ultrasound. I think I was having an anxiety attack. I was aggravated because I didn’t want to go and my appt was in the afternoon and I wasn’t suppose to eat & drink before this test. I don’t want to lose more weight. When I got there, I was given a new technician to do the test (with her supervisor in the back ground).

I stewed about it all the way home, in tears, having doubts about everything and wishing I could call Michelle or Maria to talk to them. Oh how I wished they were still alive. And then the strangest thing happened. The new Adele song came on the radio. I always associate Adele with Maria O’Kane because one time when I was over at her house her daughter Sam did a song/dance routine to one of her songs. I had to smile because I know Maria I would have said, “The Drs here know shit.”  Then the song “Don’t you worry Child, Cause Heavens Got A Plan For You” which I took as a message from Michelle who was the most religious person I knew. So I stopped letting my mind go to the dark side and just concentrated on driving, singing, and praying. My friends in heaven were communicating from the dead. Call me crazy. I don’t care. I felt them with me.

Today I had to go to my onc. for my shots and to discuss further treatment plans for me (i.e.  chemo). I did not want to go. I had some really bizarre dream last night….something about if my oncologist dumped me as a patient, it would be a good thing because my oncologists wife was doing something wrong and was evil ( I don’t even know his wife). I dunno it was really weird. Took Bobo with me for morale support.

My onc. dr was unusually quiet. Didn’t say one word about going back on chemo. He knew I went to Germany. He handed me a paper with my abdomen results which indicated there was nothing abnormal….no sign of metastatic cancer in any of my organs (liver, gallbladder, kidneys etc). “What a minute”, I said. “What about the thing that was growing at the head of my pancreas? I questioned.  What happened to it! “It’s gone” he said. “What do you mean it’s gone? I asked. “Oh there must have been something wrong with the last CT scan when they did it”, he replied.

However, it wasn’t just one CT scan that showed this thing on my pancreas, it was two. I have records on two scans that there was something there. And now, since I came back from Germany, I have one record that shows it’s gone since.

Bobo said he is puzzled. He doesn’t know what to think.

I told him I needed to get off the tamoxifen for a while because I think that was giving me the pain I was getting on my side, breathing problems, and blurry vision. He told me that was fine and if I wanted to go on it again, even 1/2 dose, I knew where to find him.

I also told him my Dr in Germany told me not to get my lung examined for 6-8 weeks because it would take time for the medicine to work. My onc said, “Sure, when do you want him to book it?”  I said after December 25th because I didn’t want to wreak my Christmas! So I have a chest CT scheduled for some time in early January.

Glad that appointment was over. Getting my shots at PMH next month, then I have to get CCAC to give them to me Christmas Eve because the hospital is closed.

So happy today! That appt wasn’t bad at all. Things are looking up!

So yah think in January if this thing on my lung is gone that he is going to believe in alternative medicine!?

Nah!

 

Fry the F**kers!


Looks like a have one or two new tumours giving me grief (T8-9).  My radiation doctor doesn’t really want to radiate it, saying I’ve had too much radiation.  He thinks I may qualify for a clinical trial on Photodynamic Therapy.  Small surgery, put some chemo/dye at the site, blow up the cancer cells with light/oxygen and cement the leftover hole in the bone. 


NutellaI was suppose to go have a CT Scan on Friday night at Sunnybrook to see if I fractured my spine during my Laser Quest escapade.  Still hurts.  I asked the secretary and the guy who phoned me about the scan to make sure that they also put in a requisition to check my liver/lungs while they were at it because I did not want to have more CT scans when I could do all three at once.  Needless to say,  I arrived at Sunnybrook only to be told that they were going to only check my spine.  I told the lady that I had an appointment to check all 3 areas at Toronto Western on August 5th and I’d rather keep that appointment instead.  So I left.  One CT scan is the equivalent to 500 x-rays.  Figured with this move I saved myself from an extra 1,000 x-rays and an additional dose of radiation dye.  Don’t think my radiation guy is going to be happy with me though when I see him on Wednesday.


In the meantime, I  have decided to try to blow up the tumour myself using Far Infra-Red Rays.  I bought this thing called a Biomat (by Richway).  It was not cheap.  I have been researching about it since I recently discovered it on a metastatic cancer website (Inspire).   Many lung cancer patients were getting good results after buying one.  Helped with pain management, got rid of the mucous in lungs after a couple of sessions and reduced/stabilized  tumour growth.  People felt better after using it.  Some hospitals in Japan are beginning this technology as well.

Biomat Pic.

Cancer patients typically have low body temperature (mine is 95 degrees celcius, when it should be 98).  I have been using a heating blanket/pad to combat feeling cold which is not good as it gives off electromagnetic waves (bad for the good cells in your body).  The biomat releases Far infrared rays (which cancer hates) and it’s good for your healthy cells.  It penetrates 6 inches deep into the body and also provides you with negative ions, improves your blood circulation and digestive system, and detoxes your body.  For every one degree you increase you core body temperature, it can make your immune system work more effectively.  For cancer patients it makes sense  that if you can improve your immune system, you have a better chance at living longer. 

Now that I’ve been using it for a couple of days, I am finding that I don’t feel like I’ve been shot in the back when I wake up….it’s more a feeling of being punched between the shoulder blades.  My digestive system has improved.  My body temperature is at 96.4, instead of 95, which still isn’t normal (98) but it’s on the right track.  I also have a lot more energy and feel better.  For some strange reason, my allergies seem better too.

Newest immunotherapy techniques involve giving patients a vaccine like polio (without the paralysis part of the disease) to stimulate the body to cause a fever.  If you can get a temperature of 104 for 20 minutes, you can kill cancer cells. 

Found a case of a breast cancer patient who got rid of the mets in her spine by going on the biomat over 2 months for 30 minutes each day at 158 degrees fahrenheit, the highest setting.

So my objective right now is to get my core body temperature to normal and at some point, to fry the fuckers.

And I’m going back to Germany in October.  Was hoping I’d be there for Octoberfest to try some beer and sausages, but apparently that event takes place in September.  Go figure.

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her-side-of-the-bed

Funny Story…..

The day I brought my Biomat home and put it on the bed, our cat Jumper decided it was hers and lay on it.  Every time I went near her to get her off, she smacked me with her claws, which she never has ever done before.  I had to call for reinforcements….Bobo!  “Get her off my biomat”, I implored.  Man, she was not happy when he finally managed to scoop her up and move her.  Decided this new thing on the bed was hers.  Odd, don’t you think?  

Visions of Spending My Summer Vacation In Jail

July 6, 2015

bail money“I’m going to jail,” I proclaimed to Bobo after receiving an email from my accountant.  “That’s good”, responded my husband, the eternal optimist….”free medicine when you are in jail “.  Good point….never quite thought of jail in that way.

eggsRevenue Canada is auditing me once again.  Really?  Can’t they pick on someone else for once?  Why me?  The last time they audited me I had to prove I gave birth to two children and they both went to daycare.  Seriously, can they not connect to another government computer to see that my children actually exist?  Now Revenue Canada wants proof that I went to Germany for Cancer Treatment.  All this for a little over a lousy $2,000 I got back for my tax return.   Oh Crap if I have to pay any of it back.

hairSo guess what I have been doing over the last couple of days?  Pouring through past receipts, visa statements, medical records, etc.  to come up with everything I spent on transportation (flight/train), accommodation, prescriptions, food, and treatment.  I’ve got 30 days.  That’s how I started my summer vacation.  Hmmpf.

This morning I woke up in excruciating back pain in which I could barely breathe.  “I am so not going to make it until my MRI next Friday”, I thought.  May have to park myself at an ER today.  It felt like someone shot a big hole between my shoulders. On a scale of 1-10, it was a 20.  Time to call an ambulance?  Phoned my radiation guy who told me to come in.  Explained to him that I am crazy, did something stupid (played Laser Quest at my sons birthday party)  and have been seeing stars ever since.  “Possibly fractured,” he said. 

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my own little worldI also told him I ran out of snake venom from Germany over a month ago and perhaps the cancer may be back.  His eyes and mouth opened wide in shock at the mention of the snake venom.  “Yeah, that’s right.  Snake venom.  Poisonous Snakes will kill you if they bite you, but its harmless if you ingest it…yet it prevents cancerous tumours from getting a blood supply.  That got his attention.  Big grin too.  Gotta luv da guy.

Now I would never be able to have this same conversation with my oncologist, who I imagine would just throw his hands in the air, tell me it’s quackery once again, and kick me to the curb side, because nothing but conventional medicine works.  I would oh so like to prove him wrong.  I would get such smug satisfaction in that.  I told him I was having considerable back pain lately.  The only thing I got out of him on Friday was that it, the cancer, was probably everywhere by now and I need another CT scan at the end of July.  I’m waiting to see what next weeks MRI shows before I agree to attend that one.  It happens to be scheduled on the same day as my visit to St. Annes Spa…..I won their Spa Lotto Contest for a free hydrotherapy session.  So guess where I want to be on July 30th?  Not exactly jumping through hoops to get the radiation equivalent amount of 500 X-rays when I just had that one done in April.  Besides didn’t my soothsayer doctor also tell me that I would be back to drain cancerous fluid from my lungs by now?  Did that happen?  Nope.  Well then?  Why spoil a potential beautiful day at the spa for a CT scan?  Maria O’kane got it right when she told me to “Do What You Want.  Don’t want to go to an appointment, then don’t go.”   “Fuck the doctors, they know shit”, she used to tell me.  Sometimes you just get to the point when you get sick of being told what to do and need some rest and relaxation time so you don’t go mentally insane from the bullshit.

And so the saga continues. 

old ageI asked the x-ray technician what happens if I have a fracture.  He said, “Spinal Decompression”.  “Oh shit,” I thought. “…does that mean two metal rods to hold up my back?” I asked him.  “Yup”, he answered.  “How ’bout cement?  Can they do that instead?”, I asked.   “Depends,” he answered.  “Damn those Laser Quest battery packs.”  “Damn me for being such a big kid and wanting to do things I should not be doing”.

He went to look at the film.  “Oh, you already have two metal rods in there near T 12”.  “That’s right, and it was so enjoyable the first time that I never want to experience it again.”  I think I’d rather get radiated.

My doctor phoned me a couple of hours after I got home…lucky for me it’s not a fracture causing me this grief. Spared another set of rods!   That’s a relief.

Perhaps my new back pain was due to another one of my stupid (?) moves in which a truck dumped three 2×4’s in front of my car on Bayview Avenue the other day, blocking traffic.  Me, clearly insane, put on my hazard lights, and hopped out of my car in an attempt to move them to the side.  Too heavy.  Moved them a couple of inches until two men told me to step aside so they could take them to the curb.  Thank heavens for the good Samaritans.  The driver realized his load was on the street, parked his truck, and ran back to get it.  Jumped back into my car and continued on my journey when the wood was safely removed.

Wonder if this new pain has anything to do with that German vitamin (?) capsule I’ve been taking.  The (?) means I don’t really know what is in it.  Again.  Here, let me type in the ingredients.  If any of you read German, let me know what you come up with. Looks like vitamins to me, but who knows?

Ammoniummolybdat

Tri magnesium citrat

Eisen II gluconat

Zinkorotat

Mangangluconat

Kupfersulfat

Natriumselenit

Selen ion

Time for more oxycocet and a soak in the tub.

wierd

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July 7, 2015

gratitudeFeel surprisingly good today.  Back is not great, but it’s manageable without pain meds.  Didn’t take the Vitamin Capsule.  Hmmm.  Wonder if whatever is in that German capsule likes to attack radiation sites?   My neck and pelvis was hurting yesterday too.  

Got another phone call from Sunnybrook. My MRI has been bumped up once again to this Sunday.  My radiation doctor is a saint. 

Just a thought….If nothing (cancer) shows up on the MRI, how am I going to explain this one? Hi, I was in excruciating pain for nothing…no fracture, no cancer…just a German vitamin capsule.  Hmmmm……I may be so in the dog house.  

Suggestions for a lovely gift basket?

Lung X-Ray Results

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I went to see my oncologist yesterday for my 2 shots in the stomach and my much anticipated x-ray of my lungs.

Last month when I ended up in the ER with chest pains/breathing problems, I had a CT scan.  The technician reported that there was “probable evidence” of metastatic breast cancer invading my lungs.  My oncologist said that within 3 weeks it would most likely spread and I would probably have to have my lungs drained of fluid.  My family doctor,  foreshadowing  my steady demise, told me she thought I should get back on chemo. (like my oncologist said I should).  My benefits team of doctors also warned me that there were mets in my lungs and told me to get back on Tamoxifen to see if that would make a difference.  Meanwhile, I was sitting tight thinking that they were all wackos (my husband concurred).  I mean, I know that they are concerned that I’m not doing conventional treatment, but boy they really jump on the cancer bandwagon when something looks different on a scan.  I mean, it can’t be something ordinary.  It has to be cancer!  How about allergies or some other explanation?  Nope.  Cancer.  Three against one.

IMG_0657IMG_0656I felt better after seeing my radiation oncologist last week.  My spirits were buoyed when he told me there was no evidence of mets progression in my spine. It now became three against two because he was impressed that I was doing so well and he wanted to know what I was doing in Germany.  I told my family doctor that it didn’t make sense that my spine was fine and all of the sudden there was metastasis growing in my lungs.  She said cancer can go anywhere it wants.  That’s fine and dandy lady, but isn’t it probable that it would be advancing in my spine too?  I decided my family doctor is really not too bright.  I mean, I didn’t go to medical school or anything like that, but really?  This whole thing seriously did not make any sense to me.  And besides, I’m still shaking my head at her last stupid comment when I had an ear infection (in February) and she told me I should get my face x-rayed because the cancer may have spread to some bone near my ear.  My oncologist practically had a heart attack suppressing a burst of laughter when I told him that one!  I could see tears in his eyes and even he told me that maybe it was time to a get a new family doctor because cancer doesn’t work that way.


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IMG_0655 IMG_0654 IMG_0653So as I was waiting to see my oncologist for my x-ray results, I got an email from myUHN account (a new program which informs you when your test results are in).  Bonus!  Now I get to know what’s going on before he even comes into the room.  Scanned it quickly.

The cardiac pericardial silhouette is normal. There is a small nodular opacity in the right lower lung better visualized in the chest CT.There is mild linear fibrosis in the lung apices. (that’s scarring from radiation)

There is no other significant abnormality seen in the lungs.

There is no significant abnormality seen in the mediastinum.

There is no pleural effusion.

SMIRK!  So there is nothing really going on my lungs.  “Oh, this is going to be a good appointment,” I chuckled to myself.

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Now, do you think he would admit that I was stable and that whatever I was doing in Germany was working for me?  Nope!  He just picked up the box of zolada (shot that stops my periods/estrogen which I’ve been on for years and I still had progression while on it) and said, “Oh this must be working for you and you must have a really slow growing cancer”.  “Yeah, sure,” I thought.  “I’ve been diagnosed with a very aggressive form of DCIS and it magically has disappeared.  I haven’t been on conventional medication for a good 1 1/2 years and I’m doing okay!   A big part of me wanted to tell him that the snake venom was doing the trick, but I kept my big mouth shut.  However, one day it’s going to come out!  And I can’t wait to see his face when I tell him that!  I will need some sort of video recording device to capture the moment.  And I want my husband there so we can laugh about it for many years to come.  

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And then my onc. burst my little bubble some more by saying that this test wasn’t as good as the CT Scan (which shows more).  Hang on there bud.  Wasn’t I told that I suppose to be chock full of mets in 3 weeks and shouldn’t I be having my lung drained by now?  

IMG_0649“So what do you want to do now?” he asked me.  “Nothing”, I told him.  I’m having some issues with my heart which I need to address.  Right now, I’m staying off everything.  He told me the tamoxifen may have contributed to the fluid build up around my heart.  I really don’t think it was that…I’m quite certain it’s from the overdose of stuff that naturopathic dr gave me a week before the heart problems started.  I’m having an echo done on Monday and I’ll be sporting a 24 hour holter monitor on Monday.  I investigated everything I was taking (vitamins/supplements) and have come to the conclusion that everything I was on was interacting with each other.  So now I’m off pretty much everything until things settle down. 

IMG_0648I feel much better today and my new shipment of injections/drugs have arrived from Germany.  My oncologist nurse told me I lost too much weight (10 pounds due to gluten-free, sugar free, dairy free crappy diet) and there was not much stomach fat to stab me with the needles.  I told her that I like seeing my toes when I look down.  She shook her head at me and told me to be careful, cancer patients need all the nutrients they can get from food.  

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So I went to an All You Can Eat Buffet after that appointment to celebrate!  Food, here I come!

I started juicing more at home too.  Still can’t walk up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing…will know what my heart’s ejection fraction is some time next week.  I know it’s not normal, but I hope it rebounds for the better soon… I’ve got places to go and people to see!

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P.S.  Frick came in 4th place for Javelin throwing in the East Toronto Finals at Birchmount Stadium and will be going on to the City Finals on Tuesday.  That girl’s got a good throwing arm.

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I met someone at the Naturopathic clinic who has breast cancer and was basically told she was incurable and was going to die.  Like me, she is not doing conventional treatment.  She went to Tijuana and The Issel’s Foundation ($70,000) and managed to shrink her tumour from about 8 cm to  0.7 cm.  However, her disease is now progressing.  Told her about Germany.  Guess where she is today?  Yup.  Flew to Baden-Baden and begins treatment Monday.  I really hope Dr. Sommer can help her as her oncologist here is the same as mine.

Wouldn’t that be something?  More arsenal for alternative treatment in Germany when two of us are sporting good results, don’t you think?.  Wonder if I can find and ship some more of his patients to Germany.

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By the way, I think I should give you his address in case any of you are in a pickle and need alternative treatment.

Cell Vital Clinic (cellvital@freenet.de  (or) info@cellvital.net)  Telephone:  011 49 7221 39 19 49

Dr. Daniel Sommer

Lange Strasse  72

Baden-Baden, Germany

Web-Site:  www.cellvital.net

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Todays paintings were created by our grade 1 students (with the help of the grades 7/8’s because they were having trouble cutting out their fish with scissors) in the style of Eric Carle.  I have tremendous respect for grade 1 teachers because I think it’s one of the hardest grades to teach.