It’s Carnival Time In The ER

August 1, 2013

Felt like I was drowning, so I asked my brother-in-law, Sal to take me to emergency at Mount Sinai. Unfortunately it was bad timing. Early evening isn’t ideal. Usually means a long wait.

There were 2 paramedics and four cops for one patient. Not sure what he did but the nurse told me not to sit near him. Then there was a young pregnant mother yelling at everyone. First she accused them of hiding her son in the back. Later she screamed she had to pick up her son at 5:15. The paramedics told her that her neighbour has her kid. Sal chucked and said that’s going to be rather hard since it was 7:48. Her mother and grandmother arrived a bit later and the daughter said why won’t they let me leave? They checked her anal cavity and everything else. Her relatives told her maybe if she behaved herself, they would let her live.
There was one guy who looked like he had flesh eating disease on his toe and another guy who looked like his appendix was in trouble. I felt sorry for him cause that looked painful.

Eventually I had my blood tested and a chest scan which revealed that my lungs were full of fluid, particularly the right side (which was partially collapsed due to an earlier radiation treatment). They told me I had lung mets. Because I was already on oxygen to breathe, they had to put me in one of their glass rooms where I spent the night. Otherwise I would have been in the hallway because they had no beds available in the hospital. They had to keep me until the next day to drain my lung.

It was in my glass compartment that I saw Jessie James across from me. His name? was tattooed on his arm amongst a variety of other tattoos. When Sal was in the hallway he asked him to come in and count his money. Sal thought he was blind because Jessie James was wearing big, black sunglasses on his face. So he started counted the money for him and one of the bills fell on the floor. Jessie told him he dropped one. Sal was speechless. Why was he counting the money for him if he wasn’t blind? So Sal returned his money and told him he had $230. Then he came to my room and told us what happened. My sister Angie arrived by then and we laughed.

Then another patient with an accent arrived next door screaming that Via Rail poisoned him. He put up quite an alarming fuss until a nurse came in and told him to stop being so loud. He protested and kept yelling. Jessie James overheard the conversation and ran out of his room and in a very big voice yelled, “SHUT UP!”  The poor nurse then told Jessie to go back to his room and that he is NOT ALLOWED to YELL at patients. He said he was only trying to help. She ushered him back to his room.

Shortly thereafter the guy next door started puking his head off. It wasn’t ordinary puke either. It was seven unbelievably loud waterfalls. It sounded like his vomit was exploding all over the room. Thank heavens I couldn’t smell it or I would have died. Just hearing him barf was enough. That poor nurse had to change twice because of that patient. I seriously don’t know how the cleaners in the hospital and nurses do their jobs. I could never do it. Never, ever.

Bobo then came to visit with Frick and Frack. We told them about Jessie James and Bobo walked out over to his room, sat down and started talking to him. Figures. Frack kept peering through the curtains to see what was going on outside. Bobo went to buy Jessie James a hot chocolate (amongst other things) and quickly became Jessie James best friend. And you how I know that? Because Jessie came to my cubicle in the middle of the night and told me that Bobo was his best friend. That’s why.

Jessie also disappeared for some time and came back with about 10 packages of candies (like Jube Jubes) and hospital security staff on his tail. Earlier, Jessie could be seen walking the halls in nothing but a diaper….until the nurse caught him and told him he needed to put some clothes on. I didn’t see the diaper when I looked out the glass door because of a partition. I thought he was stark naked as he looked at me through the door.

At 2:00 in the morning, just as I finally started falling asleep, Jessie came to knock on my door and say, “God Bless”. Bobo told me he was Christian and had some sort of terminal liver disease.

During the early morning, I looked outside to see Jessie carrying two “Its a Boy” and “It’s a girl” balloon bouquet entering his room. “He must be a kleptomaniac,” I thought. No wonder he had three pairs of sunglasses in his room. Five minutes later, an angry woman ran into his room, grabbed the pink bouquet and said, “This one IS MINE”. I wonder if Jessie made it all the way to maternity to get those.

Eventually, I was sent to have my lung drained. They froze my back and put a needle near my shoulder and drained 1.26 litres of honey coloured fluid. Luckily I had my oxycocet pills on me because I didn’t want to feel the pain. I coughed a lot after the procedure trying to expand my lungs. Best case scenario was that the remaining fluid would dry up and I’d be okay. (But that’s not what happened).

Went back to the ER and waited until they had a room available. Both Jessie and I got a room at pretty much the same time. Jessie told me to tell Bobo to come visit him in Room 312 so they could play chess.


The decision to leave the hospital was an easy one. The old lady next to me in the semi-private room had a commode next to her because she could get to the bathroom. I think she broke her hip, but truthfully, she could get around much better than me. So when she had a dump, it was so intoxicating I would start to heave. I would jump out of my bed and try to run out the door. That’s kind of hard to do when you are attached to a bedside oxygen hose that was too short for my quick getaway. The only way out was with my portable oxygen tank which took some time to set up. I would look at my older sister with tears of in my eyes, pleading her to “Get me Outta Here”. She warned me once that something was happening but I didn’t get what she was getting at. But I did after that.

We couldn’t return to my room for hours because of the smell. It was that bad. Then I just wanted to leave.


Returned to the ER the following Thursday at 6:00 in the morning at the urging of who Bobo calls Dr Kavorkian, my palliative care dr in Vaughan. He gave me an expiry date. October 8 on the bell curve.

It was very quiet in the ER with only one other patient. I finally discovered what it would take for the ER department to move super fast like on TV. I sipped some water which went down the wrong way. I started coughing like crazy. Couldn’t catch my breathe. Security ran to the back and alerted everyone and suddenly I had an entourage of nurses and doctors around me. “What’s wrong?”, Someone asked me. “Can’t breathe” and all of the sudden I was whisked into a back glass room. “Cool” I thought, now this is fast service. Then the next thing I knew a crazy dr started digging into my arm with a needle to find a vein. She didn’t get it right away so she started moving it sideways, back and forth, back and forth as I’m screaming my head off.

She asked me why I was there. I told her my palliative Dr saw me last evening and I needed a permanent drain for my right lung because it was full of fluid. “Why didn’t you come last night?” she questioned. “What is your Drs name?” I didn’t want to get him in trouble so I told her I didn’t know, it was the first time I met him. She was mad.

Wasn’t looking to promising to get the procedure done, but they did manage to squeeze me in between two patients at 2:30. Drained 900 ml of more fluid. I now have a tube in my side between two ribs. I won’t be able to take baths anymore and if I get an infection I’m as good as dead, I think.

They discharged me quickly and told me to get out of the hospital. Germs.


Things are not looking so great. I’ve had a lot of fluid drained from my lung everyday by a home nurse. If it was only 300 ml, the nurse would only have to come every other day. But I’ve had 600, 700 and 500ml over the last few days. And to make things worse, when I drink water, it sometimes goes the wrong way. The nurse said my muscles in my esophagus aren’t working and neither are the muscles in my chest to breathe. So I would have to buy a thickener to put in my liquids by Nestle. My sister bought it. You know what’s in it? Corn starch and sugar. GMOs and sugar to feed my cancer. Lovely.

By the way, I had a CT Scan. I have a fractured pelvis and something is going on with my tailbone. It hurts. My ilium bone (left hip) is gone and is being taken over by soft tissue. Osteoporosis and cancer. My liver is still clean. I attribute that to the artesunate therapy I get from Germany. Really wish my lung was okay but it’s not. Time to face reality. I gave it a good run, but am suffering from battle fatigue. Eight years is a long time for a person in my condition. I know I would have been dead a lot sooner if I did conventional treatment. I just think my amalgam toxicity, mould exposure and Lyme disease didn’t help my immune system keep the cancer away. And stress didn’t help either.

I just worry about my kids and not being there to help them through the good times and bad. Too soon to lose their mother at their ages. It’s never a good time, really. Frack cried and said I wouldn’t be at his graduation and I wouldn’t be a grandmother and it wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t it have been somebody else? I told him his wife would probably still have a mother and she would be his children’s grandmother. I worry about him. He has trouble expressing himself verbally. I think Frick will be okay. She is so mature for her age and I know she will take care of Frack. It hurts me that I want to be there for them and I can’t. It really isn’t fair. My heart is broken.








Maria Arruda’s Birthday

IMG_6454IMG_6454Tuesday May 30

Starting to feel a bit better. Dr Mariam gave me some homeopathic drops to reduce the pleural infusion in my lungs. It seems to be working. When I have trouble sleeping, I have to sit upright, not lay flat.

So Dr Sommer said I’m in much better shape now than when I came. He showed me the pictures of my fingertips from the dark room and they had thick black halos around them. Now they are grey. He said everything is working better but not my gallbladder. I must drink 1 1/2 litres of water every day. My liver, kidney, intestines, pancreas, and brain have improved.

He says the problems I’m having with my lungs are due to the parasites which are feeding off the toxicity of my amalgams. However I can’t take them out right now because I am too weak and it would be dangerous. I’m to keep detoxing, gain some weight and come back in September. And start chelation 2 weeks before I come.

Today was Maria’s 52nd birthday. We went to a nearby tapas restaurant called Monte Christopher, a local favourite.

Sorry to post this days later, but our wifi at this apartment is a bit sketchy.


I went to Germany with a friend I met from the RSNC named Maria Arruda and her friend Felicia.

We went via Air Canada.  Never again.  I hate that airline.  Food sucks and they couldn’t promise the food I was getting had no dairy, gluten or nuts in it.  Tasted like shit.  Good thing my gut instinct was to grab some California rolls from the sushi airport restaurant or I would have starved to death.

We had a bit of a problem at the car rental place.  They gave us a really huge SUV and I was not comfortable driving it.  So we waited a couple of hours til the next car came in.  And low and behold, it was a nice, sleek black Jaguar.  Worth the wait. I LOVE this car.

We went briefly to the old part of Frankfurt…


And continued to Weisbaden.

Then we went to a beautiful little Tea shop (it was raining outside) and had a lovely afternoon Tea.  There were two old wax figures of women having tea in the store front window, so we thought it would be grand to try it out.   We weren’t disappointed. It was a lot of fun.


Lovely florist shop with stunning flowers.

Well, at least the ducks were enjoying this wet weather!


How Alpine Roofing Did A Shitty Job On My Roof

The last couple of months since I got back from Germany in December have been trying, to say the least.

I was really sick in January; coughing so bad I couldn’t sleep. The mucus from my congested sinuses always ended up filling up my lungs. My family dr ordered clarithromycin which ended up given me candida. My gut, which already was pretty precarious, became an overgrowth of bad bacteria.

Meanwhile I got very stressed. My younger sister slept over in my room and was sick when she woke up.  Same symptoms as me.  Congestion/sinuses etc. She told me that there was something really bad in my room.

I phoned a home inspector who found mould in my attic. I had readings of 1200 m3 of aspergillosis penicillium in my bedroom (while downstairs and outside, it was only 300).  My other sister is dealthly allergic to the medication penicillin and I’m allergic to ceftin, a cousin of the penicillium family.  Mould is our enemy.

I then had my house insurance advisors inspect the house.  They did a report indicating that the problem in my attic had to do with shoddy workmanship and I would have a good case against the company who did it should I decide to sue. Apparently the idiots at Alpine Roofing neglected to properly ventilate the attic when they did my roof. They improperly installed a vent above my bedroom which was leaking and they also shingled over the vent.

No air was properly circulating in my attic for 12 years. They never changed the wood even though my husband was up there and asked them if it needed to be replaced.  They said it was fine and shingled over the old wood.  The other 4 vents didn’t have much of an opening for the attic to breathe and they didn’t bother checking inside to see what was going on either.  If they had they would have noticed that the soffits were plugged up and there were no holes in the baffles to allow air to flow. In other words, none of the hot/cold air was escaping/circulating allowing the boards under the shingles to rot.


Another thing I learned about improper roofing installation is that when you get your roof done, the size of the spaces between the shingles should be even. As you can see from the photo, there are some larger and smaller gaps between the rows.  As you can see here Alpine Roofing did not take the time to install the shingles correctly. Look at the gaps and how crooked the alignment is.  I wish I knew then what I know now.

I ended up spending the winter at my parents house because every time I went into my house my nose would water and I’d have to wear a mask. And it was no picnic at my parents house. Sometimes they would wake up at 3:30 in the morning, eat breakfast until 4:30 (with the radio on very loudly because my dad is going deaf even though he refuses to believe it and won’t wear a hearing aid). I got out of the house and kept busy when I could but I missed being in my own home. Meanwhile I started to rapidly lose weight.

I was incensed about the whole situation I found myself in. I was so mad at Alpine Roofing my body started becoming very acidic due to the stress and I could barely eat because it was becoming more and more difficult to eat food that I wasn’t allergic to.

I hired a woman named Caroline from Energy Shack (Midland/Progress) to provide me with organic juices and meals. I did a five day juice detox program as I knew I was becoming too toxic. I also did a coffee enema, colon hydrotherapy and ozone sauna when I noticed things coming out the other end that should not have been there. Those things were parasites. So I started a parasite cleanse and discover I had rope worms, tapeworms, intestinal flukes, liver flukes, fasciola buski and more wonderful stuff that I couldn’t identify. I got on various websites and found other people in the same boat as me finding the same horrible things in their stools. Determined to get rid of them I had weekly coffee enemas and colon hydrotherapy. I think I’m infested. The candida I got from the antibiotic made things worse.

I’ve been doing a lot of reading by Dr Hulda Clark who says she has never met a single cancer patient that didn’t have intestinal flukes. Her protocol is called the Humaworm Cleanse although it was not the one I used. I got one from the Vitalife Clinic at the beaches and it’s been pretty successful at removing these unwanted creatures. I’d show you pictures but they’d gross you out. Some of the worms had blood on their heads where they would attach themselves to my intestines. I read about liver flukes from Kaiulani’s Facciani’s cancer blog a long time ago but didn’t want to undergo the process of elimination. I should have. It may have saved my gut from the onslaught of these creatures ruining my digestive system.  From what I read, if you are stressed, have a low immune system that’s toxic (mercury in my fillings that need to be removed), live in a toxic/mouldy environment and have candida overgrowth, you provide the perfect host for parasites.

Meanwhile, I showed pics of my discoveries to my family dr who thought I had C Difficile from the antibiotics and she thought they weren’t worms but my intestines were coming out.  Lovely.  Just what a needed. Sent some stool samples for parasite testing in Canada and what do you know? Nothing. But my dr only tested for 5 things and two of them were salmonella and ecoli. What about testing me for the plethora of fasciola buski I found.  Not testing me for the right stuff for heavens sake. Nothing showed up for C. difficile either. At least I didn’t have that to also worry about.

Meanwhile I stopped taking my daily injections from Germany because I’m pretty sure my husband was injecting it into a nerve because I was having a hard time walking.   I lost so much weight and muscle mass (due to not exercising…I fell down the stairs in January and was taken by ambulance to the hospital).  My left leg was so bad after an injection I literally had to lift it up with my hands to get in and out of the car.  I could barely walk so I stopped taking them.  Could not exercise because it was too painful.

In February/March I tried in vain to find a lawyer to represent me. More stress. Fortunately, my friend Ric connected me to a friend of his who was a lawyer.  He told me that unless this case was worth 1/4 of a million dollars, it wasn’t worth persuing by a lawyer. He explained how it was going to drag out in court and how I’d be paying a fortune in lawyers fees and “expert” testimony. For example I’d have to hire another mould expert with a doctorate because mine wasn’t good enough.  Besides Alpine Roofing has a lot more money to represent themselves than I do.  He told me my best bet was to just replace the roof or go to small claims court and represent myself. I knew I was too sick to go through that mess and it would cause me more stress and grief so I went to the bank and refinanced my mortgage to get the job done.

At this time my blood test results showed I was rapidly depleting calcium from my bones. When you get too stressed, that’s what happens. Your body becomes too acidic and in order to compensate, calcium is released to the bloodstream to alkalinize it. It can also be a bad sign for late stage cancer.

I tried to explain what was going on to my oncologist but it fell on deaf ears. Told him I lost weight because I can’t eat anything cause I’m so allergic to so many foods and I was toxic. He wouldn’t hear of any of it. Including my mouldy roof. He thinks I have cancer all over my lungs, bones, body. Wants me to get a ct scan (equivalent to 500 X-rays and one X-ray is equivalent to a years worth of radiation a typical person gets from the environment, like TV/microwave exposure), which I declined. I told him he could do an ultrasound on my liver, but that was about it. I already knew I had pleural effusion in my lungs so what was the point?  Fortunately I got the results from my ultrasound and  there was no evidence of disease in my liver.  Thank heavens   One thing going right even though my ALP is very high.

Meanswhile my onc has given me two choices. One, capecitabene (the one that burned my hands and feet) or 2,  the chemo IV drug Pacetaxol (cousin of docetaxol which stopped my heart and didn’t work 8 years ago).

My radiation dr is telling me I have cancer throughout all my bones and lesions in my lower back. He told me to call him if I started seeing double and he would get me in right away to zap my brain.

So now I’m on my way to Germany once again to sort out this mess.

Rest In Peace, Julie Deutsch

During the last week-end in April, I had the privilege to go to Philadelphia on a free travel grant from Living Beyond Breast Cancer.


There I met two inspiring women named Julie Deutsch and Kaiulani Facciani.  They were my roommates and so very nice.  (Me on the left, Julia in the middle, and kaiulani on the right)


I was so sad today to find out that Julie just passed away.  She apparently went into a coma during a chemo treatment and never woke up.  I’m in tears thinking about it.   She was a special lady and I was hoping to keep in touch with her and join her at another breast cancer conference next year.  I’m sorry we never had a chance to reconnect.


Praying for her and her family.


The Waiting Game

Waiting for the results of my MRI on Monday.  Had to have an “Emergency” MRI because apparently my brain is bleeding.   He is 15 minutes late and there seems to be a lot of people here before me.

Appointments Galore


Got a phone call from the hospital requesting my presence for a MRI on my brain on Monday at 12:30.  I won’t know the results until Wednesday when I see my radiation doctor.  Thinking what he said was bleeding in my head is just the hemangioma that has been there since I had the stroke/TIA in 2011.  Some blob in my brain that looks like an octopus with tenticles.  My doctor at the time told me if I couldn’t grab onto things with my hands or found myself walking weird/collapsing to come in to get examined.

Kind of funny I’ve had MRI’s every 3 months for 4 years and they just discovered my brain blob now!

Chest x-ray on Tuesday to check and make sure all my screws in my back are still holding me up!

Will be a lot happier after Wednesdays appointment.  Or maybe not????


Everything Tastes Better When You Can’t Eat It

Friday, December 15 (Photos of Frankfurt, Germany)


Nice Tie Sculpture!

I’m home now and we have had quite a bit of snow here in Toronto.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

My Lufthansa flight last week went as planned…wasn’t sure whether the pilots would still be on strike, but they must have settled because all was good.


Bobo has been watching too many of those Border Patrol shows late at night, because when the declaration note came for us to write down what we were carrying, he told me to mark “YES” under “Are you carrying any type of food, dairy, seeds, nuts, blah, blah, blah.” He said they were going to confiscate my stuff anyway, but at least I wouldn’t get charged and go to jail.  Really?  Really?  Do ya really think I’m going to jail because of some cake?  I figured I could talk my way out of it, so I told him stay quiet behind me while I spoke to the customs officer. 


img_4542I think the customs guy got a kick out of dealing with me because he was laughing his head off after our brief little discussion about what I was bringing into the country (I think they are paid to look very mean with no hint of a smile so you’d crack under pressure).  I told him I bought some Christmas Cake (Stollen) and I was sure it had nuts and seeds in it and I also had a package of stuff for my Gluhwein.  With a twinkle in his eye, he asked, “And What Exactly is Gluhwein?”.   “Oh, it’s amazing,” I said.  It’s like mulled wine and you have to put some seasoning things in there like cinnamon, cloves, and cardamon seeds”.  It’s delicious.  Those are the seeds I brought back.  He chuckled and said, “Is that all you have to declare?”  I thought for a second and said, “Yup” and he let us go on our merry little way.  Was going to tell him we also hauled a big antique clock for my dad half way across the world in an extra suitcase, but thought better of it.  The less said, the better.  If he was going to let me keep my Christmas Stollen and Gluhwein kit, I was happy.


If they took my Christmas Cake, I wouldn’t have been too upset ‘cause I can’t eat it anyway because it probably has wheat in it.  I am truly bummed out about all the foods I have to stay away from for 3 months.  It’s been a difficult week scrounging recipe books for things that have no dairy products, eggs, nuts, and is gluten free,  I made some muffins and cookies according to this new criteria and they tasted like shit.

Don’t you know, everything tastes better if you can’t eat it.  Sigh.

img_4560Two more things I wanted to tell you.  When I was hooked up to the Global Diagnostic Computer in Germany, it indicated that I have traces of Lyme Disease in my body.  May have been there for a long time.  Lyme Disease comes from a Deer Tick and screws up your hormone balance and immune system (so your body doesn’t recognize cancer is a threat).  Wondering if this could be the root cause of my problem.  Sent a blood test express post for analysis (which I was told may or may not be accurate…sometimes it reads a false negative).  Waiting for the results.  Dr. Mariann told me if it does come up as a positive reading, not to worry about it because she can cure it in two years.


Going to have an MRI next Thursday and will be seeing my radiation doctor on the 28th.  That should be fun.  Especially when it will look like my bone marrow is completely full of cancer again and I tell him the thing in my neck is not cancer.  I’m not doing anything for at least 3 months until the dust settles and I have another MRI.  Then I will have a clear picture of whats going on, if anything.


I’m reaching my limit on my free wordpress blog space.  I’m at 85% capacity.  Not sure what I want to do.  Don’t really want to pay $18 a year for my own domain, so I may open up a new blog soon.  We shall see.  

Hoping my followers will keep following me! 


Safe and Sound


Dear Friends,

Well I made it to Baden Baden after all.  I had booked my flight to Germany with Lufthansa because it, by far, has the best service, but holy moly, the pilots strike really stressed me out.  Luckily my flight wasn’t one being cancelled.  I had a stand by flight for Air Canada on hold, just in case, but it was going to cost me close to $4,000.00 ONE WAY which isn’t exactly something I can afford.  I already booked and paid for my apartment, car, and part of my cancer treatment.   My good friends prayed for me and  thank the good Lord above, I got here safe and sound.  Lufthansa is still on strike.  I may have to find another way to get home, but that’s okay.  I’ll figure something out.  Maybe take a train to Paris or London and fly home from there.  Bobo is with me while my buddy Claire is watching my kids with help from my sisters and Joyce Baker.  Thank heavens I am blessed with support!

Today was my day of diagnostic testing.  Blood work, saliva, urine, iridology (eye photos), hand/feet testing in a dark room, and something where they hook you up to a computer to see what’s going on with your body.  The computer said these are the areas I need to work on in order….

1. Stress

2. My back

3. Heavy metal toxins (where did that come from?)

4. Colon (pretty sure it’s plugged up again).

5. Gallbladder?

Plus I have some free radicals roaming around that need to be taken down.

I will get the results and plan of action tomorrow.  I have some pretty ones of Baden Baden I will post soon too!

On. our drive down to Baden-Baden yesterday, we stopped off in on of my favourite cities, Heidelberg for a little bit.  Here are some pics.

Oh oh.  Not sure I can upload too many pics.  I think I have used up a lot of the apartments Wifi trying to do that.  Sorry 😕